Country living has its disadvantages, such as being the repository of unwanted pets, in particular, cats. Domestic cats that don't have loving homes and are left to fend on their own become wild creatures, often forming feral colonies where the females reproduce prodigiously, the males fight bloody battles and disease runs rampant. Life is very short and not so sweet. This is how I came to know Blue Eyes, a beautiful cross-eyed Siamese feral tom cat who began sleeping around the house, seeking cool spots in summer and places to be warm in winter. It's not easy integrating a feral cat into your home. I gave it a try and failed. I released him today with a prayer and a few tears. Now I find myself gazing out the window hoping to see him return. I tend to melt when he looks at me with those incredibly beautiful eyes of his, pleading for love and kindness, and more importantly, for something to eat; subsequently, I feel rejected when he runs away from me in fear. This has been going on for months, but slowly he has allowed me to be his friend. As humans, we often tend to think we know what's best for everyone else while we continue making our own mistakes and learning lifes' endless lessons. I took him to the vet and had him neutered, vaccinated against rabies, feline leukemia, dewormed, revolutionized (kills fleas and ticks), and most definitely he got traumatized. Then I brought him home and set up the sunroom to be his domain, his refuge, his place of healing, his prison. The vet regretfully informed me that Blue Eyes tested positive for FIV, the feline immunodeficiency virus, and gently recommended that he be put down. The animal rescue people believe he should live out his remaining years in isolation from all other cats, including other ferals. "Such placement can be quite difficult, but you might find a no kill shelter that has a room set aside for such infected cats." Certainly a reasonable alternative to releasing him back into the wild where he may very well continue to infect other cats. In the US, it is estimated that between 1.5% and up to 4% of the cat population is infected with this virus. Worldwide the infection rate is estimated to be around 44% of all cats. Euthanasia of such infected cats is a way of bringing the infection rate down, of reducing the population of infected cats. Like the HIV virus, it is spread through the transference of body fluids, often through blood fights between tom cats who exceed females in their rates of infection. It can be passed on from mother to kittens, but not always. Much is unknown, and the vaccination is admittedly not a very effective prophalactic; however, cats can live long lives with the virus. Unlike feline leukemia, which is highly contagious and tends to make cats very sick, very quickly, the FIV infected cat can live a long life, especially if they can be put on high protein diets and given supplements and treated with antibiotics when the frequent kidney infections, and a litany of other problems, occur. Such options are not available to the feral cat. So I keep looking out the window, and if Blue Eyes shows up, he will have water, food, and shelter, but the decision is his. While writing guess who showed up? He peered in the window and meowed, but ran away when I approached. We engaged in the meow call and response. I opened the door, left the room, and watched as he tentatively entered, then proceeded to eat. Then he left. My neighbors have a room above their garage they keep open for the local feral cat community, and have managed to get most of the females spayed. Between them, and us, and a couple of other neighbors, the wild cat community has some 50 acres in which to roam in relative safety from predators. My decision to release Blue Eyes back into his community, despite his FIV positive status, was in part due to the fact that most of these cats are likely to also be infected. I've learned a lot from my neighbor and my friends at the local shelter. Hopefully Blue Eyes and I will continue growing our friendship, and he will eventually overcome his fears and allow me to provide him with more care.
