I often find myself, while reading a book, grabbing a pencil or highliter and underlining nearly every sentence I've just read with the thought: I must come back to this--it really speaks to me, there are many layers of meaning here that warrant further exploration. Bringing Yoga to Life by Donna Farhi is one such book. For example, in her chapter The Freedom of Discipline, she talks about the importance of learning to channel our energies by "increasing our tolerance for staying in the pause between desire and satisfaction." Staying in that place between wanting and getting or doing. I've been applying this pause to so many things of late and the outcome is simply wonderful. It allows for things to just unfold without me interfering, interjecting, projecting, and in general trying to control or manipulate things, even with the very best of intentions, whether I believe I'm being appropriately assertive or not. There is a gentleness in this that I like very much. Not knowing what to do is a dilemma many of us find ourselves in, as well as not knowing what to say, when to say it, whether to say it at all when confronted with difficult situations. Yes, the avoidance of conflict altogether is not a very realistic approach to living--after all, conflict of one kind or another is a fact of life--but fully understanding and seeing that fine line that divides *into action* vs *pause* is difficult for many of us to define. Staying in pause mode can bring the clarity we are looking for, and oftentimes that clarity unfolds before us while we are in a state of pause, and resolution comes to fruition while we observe. This is NOT to say we shouldn't actively participate in our lives nor does it promote procrastination. What it does say is that the habitual reacting that may have been with us for a long time may be a behavior that needs to be carefully examined. Farhi writes that the Latin root for discipline is disciplina which means knowledge, or enlightenment. Discipline sometimes has a negative connotation, but when put in the context of an action that brings knowledge and insight into who we really are, it helps to push us to show up to the yoga mat or the meditation cushion, or just get out and work at getting and finding whatever we need in a manner that is skillful and guided by discernment. Pausing can be as simple as wanting to tell a stranger in a yoga class that his behavior is insulting to the teacher and violates yoga etiquette and tradition (not paying attention to the teacher, talking so that other students cannot hear the teacher, physically adjusting a fellow student, etc.) But when you pause from saying anything and moments later learn he is the spouse and/or best friend of the teacher it's a confirmation that the pause served you quite well!! Action that is anger based, or controlling based, or care taking orientated is best kept in the pause mode. Pause doesn't mean stop permanently, it just means slow down and be very mindful before stepping in to shape or control a situation. I really do like this whole pause concept. I'm underlining Pause and examining its many underlying meanings and applications in my life.
